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In America, we have certain preconceived notions of masculinity, and what it means to be a “man.” The perception that men exhibit and exude strength — both physically and emotionally — and bravery is widely acknowledged and accepted. These traits are necessary, for they provide the basis for a man’s role as the protector. You might also add stoicism and machismo to this list. And no where is this exhibited more than in the military, where masculinity is a badge to be worn proudly. But how does this work exactly? Do these notions of manhood apply to all men? What if a man is gay? If you’re a gay man, are you still considered masculine? Take a look at this quote from The Weekly Standard’s James Bowman, regarding gay men in the military:

Facing enemy bullets — is inextricably bound up with ideas of masculinity. We also know that most heterosexual males’ ideas of masculinity are inextricably bound up with what we now call sexual orientation. In other words, “being a man” typically does mean for soldiers both being brave, stoic, etc. — and being heterosexual. Another way to put this is to say that honor, which is by the testimony of soldiers throughout the ages of the essence of military service, includes the honor of being known for heterosexuality, and that, for most heterosexual males, shame attends a reputation as much for homosexuality as for weakness or cowardice.

Apparently, shame and cowardice are conflated with homosexuality, just as bravery and masculinity are with heterosexuality. This is a vile and contemptible notion, but one that has propagated over time and generations. It is in fact, such an acceptable premise in common society, most people have not bothered to question its authenticity. By this theory, a gay man is less of a man — therefore less of a soldier and less apt to provide that blanket of bravery and protection necessary to do their job properly.

Clearly this is false, and anyone with an ounce of functioning gray matter would attest to that. Yet these perceptions of a soldier’s masculinity, or lack of, persist in the gay community. This is a contributing factor as to why gay men struggle to self identify in the military. Soldiers want to prove their worth no matter their sexual orientation, but it becomes difficult to do so as a gay man, if all you are being judged on is your gayness. Wouldn’t it be ideal if gay soldiers didn’t have to worry about doing their jobs and hiding their sexuality — and straight soldiers could perform their duties without the confines of their own prejudices binding them? Imagine the well-oiled machine that would make!

Instead, gay soldiers are beholden to the straight jacket. Kill the enemy as an openly gay soldier, risk persecution and release. Ah, the rewards of freedom. Only a “real” man is immune from them.

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